It’s been a long day, you know? Co-worker won’t shut up about her new hairdo; classmate won’t stop throwing wads of crumpled paper at you but plays the innocent act if you call attention to it; your little brother stole the last cookie out of the cookie jar (how dare he?!) You sit down to relax but alas, you desire food. Since there’s no more cookies left, you turn to your trusty ‘Men & Penguin’ box full of wafers:
“But, where are the wafers?” you wonder. And then you realized you forgot to open the box like a dumbass.
[I totally have not done that before. Totally.]
You can’t decide which one to eat first, so who ya gonna call? Ghostbusters?
You call a professional instead to test said wafers.
Here’s the lineup-
And now, their trials
First is the lemon wafer. It smells like lemon meringue pie.
It’s sweet, but not too sweet. It’s crunchy but not like a rock. It’s nicely fruity, and tastes almost like lemon meringue pie, if pie were a wafer.
If you’re looking for something sour, this is not your pal. Sure, it tastes like lemon but it’s not at all sour. Now why someone would want sour with wafer, I don’t know.
Get a professional.
If you like lemon meringue pie, then these are for you.
Next is the hazelnut wafer. Both the packs have labels that are a bit off.
Unsurprisingly, these taste similar to Nutella. Like someone just plastered some Nutella-esque stuff onto some wafers and said “Boom. Original flavoring.”
Now, I say Nutella-esque for a reason. There isn’t nearly enough hazelnut flavor. It tastes like a lesser-quality version of the chocolate wafer.
Well, considering that these are the inferior copycats to the chocolate wafers, if you like the chocolate wafers, you’ll probably like these.
Now it’s time for the vanilla wafers. Let’s see if they can beat the lemon wafers.
Uh, they have wafers? I think that counts as “good”?
These are so so so so sweet. Way too sweet. Way way too sweet. Just go get some frozen sugar and put some vanilla on it and you’ll have the taste of these wafers.
No. Just no.
Now it’s time for
hazelnut wafer 2.0 chocolate wafer.
These taste like…well…chocolate wafers. These have a much stronger chocolate flavor than the hazelnut wafers though, understandably. It’s also a darker chocolate than typical milk chocolate.
There’s not enough to satisfy my desire for more chocolate wafers.
Need. More. Chocolate. Wafers.
Lemon wafers are the best with chocolate close behind. Hazelnut wafers lag a little further behind and vanilla wafers didn’t even make the list.