Food stuffs, Sweet stuffs

Food review #4

It’s been a long day, you know? Co-worker won’t shut up about her new hairdo; classmate won’t stop throwing wads of crumpled paper at you but plays the innocent act if you call attention to it; your little brother stole the last cookie out of the cookie jar (how dare he?!) You sit down to relax but alas, you desire food. Since there’s no more cookies left, you turn to your trusty ‘Men & Penguin’ box full of wafers:

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Men & Penguin box full of wafers

“But, where are the wafers?” you wonder. And then you realized you forgot to open the box like a dumbass.
[I totally have not done that before. Totally.]

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I may or may not have eaten a pack of chocolate wafers prior to this review.

You can’t decide which one to eat first, so who ya gonna call? Ghostbusters?
No.

You call a professional instead to test said wafers.
Here’s the lineup-

The victims:

Their closeups:

And now, their trials


First is the lemon wafer. It smells like lemon meringue pie.

The Good

It’s sweet, but not too sweet. It’s crunchy but not like a rock. It’s nicely fruity, and tastes almost like lemon meringue pie, if pie were a wafer.

The Bad

If you’re looking for something sour, this is not your pal. Sure, it tastes like lemon but it’s not at all sour. Now why someone would want sour with wafer, I don’t know.
Get a professional.

Verdict?

If you like lemon meringue pie, then these are for you.


Next is the hazelnut wafer. Both the packs have labels that are a bit off.

The Good

Unsurprisingly, these taste similar to Nutella. Like someone just plastered some Nutella-esque stuff onto some wafers and said “Boom. Original flavoring.”

The Bad

Now, I say Nutella-esque for a reason. There isn’t nearly enough hazelnut flavor. It tastes like a lesser-quality version of the chocolate wafer.

Verdict?

Well, considering that these are the inferior copycats to the chocolate wafers, if you like the chocolate wafers, you’ll probably like these.


Now it’s time for the vanilla wafers. Let’s see if they can beat the lemon wafers.

The Good

Uh, they have wafers? I think that counts as “good”?

The Bad

These are so so so so sweet. Way too sweet. Way way too sweet. Just go get some frozen sugar and put some vanilla on it and you’ll have the taste of these wafers.

Verdict?

No. Just no.


Now it’s time for hazelnut wafer 2.0 chocolate wafer.

The Good

These taste like…well…chocolate wafers. These have a much stronger chocolate flavor than the hazelnut wafers though, understandably. It’s also a darker chocolate than typical milk chocolate.

The Bad

There’s not enough to satisfy my desire for more chocolate wafers.

Verdict?

Need. More. Chocolate. Wafers.


Overall Verdicts?

Lemon wafers are the best with chocolate close behind. Hazelnut wafers lag a little further behind and vanilla wafers didn’t even make the list.

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